Just how This Introverted Pastor is Extroverted upon Sunday
In my book “The Mythical Leader”, I have a whole chapter on introversion – mostly because every time I post about introversion I hear from pastors plus church members who talk about how introversion negatively impacts their own ministry. I have heard from well-meaning (hopefully well-meaning) people who don’t believe an introverted person can provide effectively as a pastor. But I have found this introverted pastor can be quite extroverted on Sunday.
When there was a level of 1 to 10 of introversion – I’ m probably a 7 or 8. (I could be a 9 some days. ) So , I understand the plight of my introverted pastor friends, and am don’t agree with those who think introversion forbids one from serving in a senior function. (In fact, within my book, I talk about some thoughts on could think it really makes me a much better leader in some ways. )
Everything that said, as pastors, the interaction we have with people is a essential role in expanding and leading the church. I’ ve written numerous times that just because I’ m introverted doesn’ t mean I actually don’ t appreciate people.
I love people. Actually. I love all kinds of people. One standard There are for my ministry is whether I’m caring the people who are difficult to appreciate. So , I strive to do so. And, We especially love to assist individuals get excited about exactly what God is doing in your daily course. That motivates me personally.
My introversion, however , if I’ meters not careful, will keep me from communicating even with people I love.
The fact is, however , if you asked most people in the churches where I use served as pastor, other than those who know me really well, they may be surprised I am a good introvert based on the Sunday interactions with people.
I’ m extremely extroverted on Sundays.
The point of this blog post is to share a bit of how do I do that.
4 ways this introverted pastor is extroverted on Sunday:
I am extremely intentional in my function.
I have to work at it. I’ m not saying it is easy, but is something worthwhile ever simple? I realize that Weekend is coming. Therefore , I plan my week around it. I intentionally program introverted moments during my week.
For example , I am cautious what I plan for Saturday night, because I know I need to be at my best for Sunday. It is rare for me to schedule a large social gathering on Saturday evenings. In fact , I’ ve found Cheryl plus my Saturday time days are the ideal preparation for an extroverted Sunday. (Obviously that’ s easier for all of us now as empty-nesters, but I was equally protective of my Saturday night whenever we had children at home. )
When I can, I actually try to be out of the office a minumum of one day a week. This can help with my sermon preparation, but also gives me “down” time. Disruptions will always come, but the more intentional We are with my calendar the more prepared I am when Sunday comes.
My family understands me and cooperates.
This is often the hardest a single, because it obviously consists of other people. The key for all of us is my family knows me as I know them. They understand Sunday takes a lot out of me mentally and physically. My loved ones realizes I need time to recover from a very extroverted Sunday. The ride to the restaurant intended for Sunday lunch is normally pretty quiet.
My family offers learned if I have got my introverted recuperation time I’ meters more engaging together the rest of the day. This is a way they partner with me in ministry. When our males were home they knew I would intentionally give them some of the best element of my day, but they also knew there have been times I would end up being quieter than other people.
My family understands my introversion, but I don’ t think they will ever feel slighted because of it. Which is key. Part of intentionality here is I can not always slight my loved ones for my ministry. So , with Cheryl and my time now, and when the boys were house, we had time collectively where we were extremely extroverted.
One hint here is for introverted – and, frankly often for men – get them doing something if you want them to engage. Cheryl and I walk with each other and she would agree I am far more talkative on those strolls than she is – and she’s the extrovert. All this takes communication and setting up expectations in relationships. That’s part of any kind of healthy relationship.
I actually realize my extroversion on Sunday is perfect for a purpose.
When I taught a very large Weekend school class (over 100 people), every week I’ d keep the room as I was praying at the close up of my training. It seemed the humble thing to do, and I was sincere for the reason that, but honestly, it was the “ safest” approach for this introvert.
Once i came into ministry and was in my 1st church, I ongoing this practice. I might “ escape” during my prayer to the back of the sanctuary. The dear older deacon came to my office one day and softly, in a very helpful method, said, “ Ron, if since you’ re praying you’ ll stroll to the vestibule plus shake people’ ersus hands as they depart, they’ ll be more likely to return the following week. ” I’ ve been doing that ever since – and how right he was. One of the most frequent comments We receive from website visitors is how they enjoyed meeting the pastor.
We can’ t imagine it any other method now. Again, I really like people, so although this drains our energy – it fuels me meant for ministry. That deacon has since passed away, but I remain thankful for the knowledge he gave me.
I rely on the Holy Spirit.
The pastor who inspired me personally most in my spiritual walk when I was obviously a 20-something year old trying to puzzle out my life direction e-mailed me once. He had read one of the introversion posts and wanted to echo the particular sentiments in it. Within it he said he has always marveled at how many introverted pastors he has seen Our god call to prospect in the church – even very large churches. He wrote, “ I’ ve been an introverted pastor of big churches for 39 years now. Just before every service I’ m saying the same thing, ‘ God, I actually can’ t do that – now exactly what are you going to do about that? ! ‘”
His humble surrender to God’ s hands has shaped a few powerful ministries below his leadership. We loved being able to email back to one of the mentors that I’ ve had a comparable prayer every Sunday – for a few less years.
Just as Moses, Gideon, and others led by means of what they felt would handicap them within following God’ t call, introverted pastor, you can do this. With God’ s help, an understanding family, and some difficult, purposeful, intentional work – if Lord has called you to it, He will provide you. Surrender to His strength and can.
A good introverted pastor could be extroverted on Sunday!
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