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How to Not Take Things So Personally: 6 Helpful Habits

“Nobody can hurt myself without my permission. ”

Mahatma Gandhi

“Do what you really feel in your heart to be right – for you’ll end up being criticized anyway. You’ll become damned if you do, and darned if you don’t. ”

Eleanor Roosevelt

A very typical problem that can drag your self-esteem down or build up so much anger that steam may start to come out of your hearing is to take things as well personally.

Which means you may try to grow several thicker skin and allow criticism, negativity or verbal attacks just wash off of you.

But that’s often easier said than done.

So in this week’s article I’d like to talk about 6 habits that really work for me – at least generally – and helps me personally to reduce the stress, anger and hurt in my life.

I hope they’ll become useful for you too.

1 . Breathe.

Just focus on your breathing for a minute or two (or for some breaths if that’s all the time you got).

Focus only on the air flow going in and out of your nasal area. Nothing else.

This simple exercise helps you to calm your mind and body lower a bit.

It will help you to create a bit of area between you and what has just happened and by doing so you’re less likely to have a knee-jerk reaction and to, for example , lash out verbally at the other person.

Going about items this way makes it easier to react to the situation in the way you may strong down want to.

2 . Get clarification.

Do not jump to conclusions depending on what you may have just confusing and let that drag you down into anger in order to feeling sorry for yourself.

Instead, ask questions if at all possible to help clarify a bit as to what the other person meant.

And, if you can, explain exactly how what he said makes you feel. We have different perspectives and ways of communicating and might not, for instance, realize that it came across as a bit severe or rude.

3. Realize that everything isn’t about you.

It’s quite simple to fall into the trap of thinking that criticism or even verbal attacks you receive are usually about you or something you did.

But it may simply become about the other person creating a bad day, week or even year. Or about how they are miserable at their work or in their marriage at the moment.

And so they discharge some pent up emotions and tensions at you who may be simply in the wrong location at the wrong time.

Remind yourself of this when you wind up in a situation in which you are likely to take things individually.

4. Talk it out.

When some thing gets under your skin and you start to take it personally then you can get stuck in a harmful spiral of sinking self-esteem that just gets more powerful and stronger.

Break out of that or avoid it by letting so what happened out into the light. Speak it over with someone close to you and let your own friend share her perspective on what happened.

Maybe she knows some thing about how the person that verbally attacked you is going by way of a tough time.

Or she could just pay attention and through that assist you to sort things out for your self and ground you towards a more level-headed perspective on what occurred.

5. Ask yourself: is there actually some thing here that could help me?

This one could be a tough one to ask yourself. Plus it may not always lead to some thing.

But by asking it you can occasionally empower yourself.

You can find one or more steps to decide to try improve whatever the criticism involved. You can start moving forward again plus regain confidence in yourself and in what you can do.

Instead of getting stuck in inaction and in replaying what happened over and over again in your head.

This one can be especially helpful if this is the fifth or tenth time you have heard the same thing through people. Then there might be something here you would like to work on (even if that might not be so fun to face).

6. Transform your self-esteem.

I’ve found that because I’ve learned to improve and maintain my self-esteem steady matters don’t get under the skin as often. I don’t take the capsules so personally and I keep a healthier perspective and distance to them.

And so they tend bounce away from quicker and not drag our day or week lower.

One simple way to start improving your self-esteem today is to be kinder to the people in your own life.

You can:

  • Help them out practically in some way.
  • Pay attention when they need the help of a friend to find a better perspective.
  • Give a genuine supplement.
  • Encourage whenever most of their world may be discouraging.

The way you treat other people is certainly how they will most often treat you too in the long run.

And, more importantly for your self-pride, when you are kinder towards others then you tend to treat plus think of yourself in a kinder way too.